Little Updates

I never had a Hakka meal outside before, even though I'm a Hakka (cos I usually have home cooked Hakka meals instead) and I ate it for the 1st time at a Hakka Restaurant, with the birthday boy, and my buddy. =P A lot of my embarassing moments were mentioned. zzz.. lol then we proceeded to The Pacific Coffee Company to chill out.. It was a great night out, with alot of 'coughs' and 'clear throats' ahem, to company it.

Today, as I was on my way to work, while waiting for the train at Hougang MRT, it seemed that someone fainted, she laid on the bench.. while the medical officers were measuring her blood pressure, etc.. She had difficulty breathing man, and looked like she was really in pain. Hope she's fine now..

And I'M SICK.. Down with flu, horrigible flu, and it becomes particularly irritating in air-con places, I cannot really breathe properly. Totally clogged up there, argh.. Been trying to stop myself from taking MC if possible, haha.. Anyway, I'm fully packed this week, so gotta catch up on my beauty sleep whenever I can.. Weekend is gonna be burnt already, and I still need to spend time to catch up on my studies.. I started studying a bit today already =x

While playing DOTA just now, it was damn hilarious, with the little arguments here & there.. Jio-ed my friend, Terence, to join Simon & JQ in our game.. and this stupid ursa in our team, kept farming non-stop, kept going to NC, while we were there pushing like mad. Reason? I not enough HP, when he has ONE heart already, and currently farming for another. zzz.. MORON.. I tried one of the new items, and the new NAIX is damn GAY.. JQ, u r very funny, cant stop laughing man..

What I Want In My Other Half:
Mature, steady, caring, gives me a sense of security, advises me what to say during interviews, gives me opinions about certain things, ambitious (not overly ambitious until it become ridiculous), trustworthy, teaches me things, gives me little surprises! woo me until I become so touched, take good care of me (physically, mentally, emotionally)..

Comfort Zone

Something hit me while chatting with one of my buddies.. and the result of that?
"I Finally Know What I Want In My Other Half." I just have to start searching again and pray to God to let me find a better one in future, but I do not need one now. I'm just taking time to heal up now. =)
To be successful, you have to make right decisions. It is the Experiences that let you make right decisions. You gain experience by making wrong decisions.

So when big things start to happen, and I don't mean small arguments / fights kinda thing, then I guess it is more of a wake up call, and then make THE decision. So it really was more of the 'big thing' being the ignition of history. If you are the girl in this situation, you may be asked this qn: "It took you xxx years to know that he's not the one for you?"

My friend has a friend who was already planning the wedding with her bf, who was already into 6-8yrs of courtship together? Then like around one month before the wedding, the girl pulled out. How to react? The girl just suddenly snapped & realized that he simply just wasn't the one for him.

Actually, all along, he wasn't the perfect person for me. Not that anyone is perfect. Now it is more of "I guess he's really not the right one for me", just that I never got down to doing anything about it. I knew of it all along and I more of accepted him as he is, accepted him as the one for me, and all his flaws. Even when I had been highlighted about his flaws, I still chose to accept it, and I was even willing to spend my life with him initially. I believed everyone had their flaws ya, and nobody is perfect. However, there is a limit as to how much one can take.

Why, you might ask? For girls, we tend to want to stay in our comfort zone, once we're attached, especially if we are with our guy for a number of years. We are generally lazy to start all over again, to search all over again, to love all over again, and if we're comfortable with our guy, we tend to not even do anything about it -> Cos those are not worth breaking up about, probably too minor to even consider about breaking up. However, I know there are girls, who can foresee this very early and did something about it there & then.

Maybe it was more of a "Love Is Blind" case for me. Too blind initially, cos I'm a soft-hearted person. It takes A LOT of me to give up on someone (some can't believe how much determination I had), but time proved everything, which led to THE decision. I quote: "When I'm off, it will be off, and in one word - Forever."

I think this comfort zone thingy applies to a lot of girls, especially if the girl is already having dilemmas if this guy is the right one for her or not. It may even apply to jobs for some.


"I'd take another chance, take a fall
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it's nothin new
I loved you with a fire red-
Now it's turning blue, and you say...
"Sorry" like the angel, heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late"

Moving On Well..

I've finally cut my hair at long last, looks a bit weird though, but it is okay after doing some styling, now must know how to style and all somemore. Past few weeks, I've been spending money like crazy man, like water literally. Worst hit was when I spent $300 one shot on 5 dresses, during my Dressing Spree. LOL, but well it is to pamper myself, so why not? I have been pampering others except myself the past few months, it is time to treat myself better, and take care of myself better.

Also started using the beauty stuff that I've been buying together with Mel. =P good good! The make up class was fun also, we learn that external beauty only consist of 20%, the balance of 80% comes from within, our internal beauty. Make up can only do so much, you need to take good care of yourself well, for you to shine from within. And there were a few guys attending too. Make up is a form of respect to others.

My ACCA Budd was asking me: "Eh, have you started studying yet not?" I was like err.. Supposed to start last Sunday, but.. haha, I spent my Sunday going out and playing DOTA when I was home, cos I figured that was the only time left to practise before my match on Tuesday (that's tomorrow!) Yesterday, I was super duper busy. After work, went for ACCA, my other friend and I were like chatting about DOTA in class somemore lor. I think everyone around us could hear us talking. zzz.. He only plays in LanCraft and REFUSES to believe that I actually play on B.Net. Kept asking if I was that PRO not? Cannot isit?

I zhao during break AGAIN (Raymond happily add see sure know you zhao one), go to Suntec meet my Kor.. By the time I went home, midnight. Zzzzzzzz.. Super tired, felt dead and grumpy. I was at work at 830am somemore for Project Meeting, but I was the only one there, besides my bosses, so meeting didn't start at that time anyway. So I was like out since 745am till 12am.. What a long day. I bathed quickly and stuff, was online for awhile then dropped dead in bed like a piggy for the rest of the night..

Met Mel's good buddy and his friend, we ate at Ding Tai Feng. Nice people. Been sometime since I went there to dine already. =P Yes, this weekend I'm booked already!! Movie, and shopping and Make Up! Woohooo.. Mel came out with this term BFB - wahaha, I love this term. Only she knows, I know, and Raymond knows (So KPO lei) and Raymond, prepare to lose your bet to me bah.

My different friends have been telling me this same sentence. How coincident that they should say about the same thing to me. "joan, i love u too... as a friend. all ur friends love u. we dun hurt u in ways nt imaginable." I love you guys. *MUACKS* Past week, I've moved on pretty well. Bochap, bochap, bochap. The songs "Makes Me Wonder - Maroon 5 and Apologize - One Republic" TOTALLY relates to me, like TOTALLY.. I do not have anymore energy to TELL to do what is right anymore.. How appropriate of the movie Lust, Caution to show at this time. Meant to be? Nice company I had for the movie, and a lot was censored for the movie man, but who cares..

Upcoming Activities

Here are some of my upcoming activities:

1. Haircut - Oh God, my hair is super duper messy. I was contemplating whether to rebond it or not, but I decided against it as I need to save some $$.
2. Celebrate parents' birthdays. Yup! Both of their birthdays are within a span of a week! Cool right?
3. Clubbing - Go to MOS with Jane Mommy & Clara maybe, and probably another clubbing session with Timothy Kor. =)
4. Make Up Class! Wahaha, cant understand why I'm going for this? My CLIENT actually asked me to join this with her. Not like I really needed it, but I just join for fun lor. Pass time also, and probably can learn something new & interesting. Will need to bring a model down on my last lesson too, should be bringing my cranky sister. LOL
5. Meet up with buddy Mel, to collect the beauty stuff that we both shared to buy together. LOL. So vain lei we 2.
6. Try to study for ACCA? LOL, I think i better get started on this soon, it is already October. Exam for my MCQ Paper is probably in Nov, the other one in Dec, at least this time, it is pretty spread out.
7. Go register for ACCA Exams with my ACCA buds.
8. Play badminton, with ZM and gang? Oei, tell me when r u organizing again lei.
9. DOTA Match with HIGH gang. Woot! Gonna use my favorite Puck Puck.
10. Shopping with Carol Tai & Jane Mommy - We spent sooo much - Hypnosis, m)phosis - 5 dresses each, omg.
11. Meet Mel's good friends for a meal & chill out session. =)


I've been wasting a lot of time on some nonsensical stuff, which is now over and done with, and I've started moving on with life.. and I MEAN what I said. I'm very firm with my decision this time and I will not look back. Yes, I am fucking heartbroken, but this does not mean being together with him will solve the problem. I guess I just need some time la, to heal up slowly, which I think I've been doing a great job so far isn't it? =P I hope so, tell me this is true.

Anyway, things have gone to such a stage similar to "Broken pieces of glass" - No matter how you try to mend the pieces back, it will never be the same again, the cracks are permanent. I made some predictions for the future, and I believe my predictions will turn out very true. 6th sense. Wahaha. Hope I can find my Mr. Right in time to come! Where are you har?!

And I strongly believe in Karma - "Don't do unto others, if you don't want others to do unto you". It doesn't have to be the exact same situation, it could be Karma in different perspectives. - In the recent saga, I felt like the worst victim ever. I ever contemplated doing something mean, but after a while, I guess I'm not that sort of person, don't wanna be a bitch. I rather keep my reputation.

Two words to sum up everything: IT'S OVER!